Tuesday, December 13, 2011

How To Have Cancer and Talk To People

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I'm that guy to write it, ...well at least a guy who could plagiarize heavily the original format and twist it to suit my opinion.



TuesDAY, DEC 13, 2011 5:00 PM PST

How to talk to someone without cancer

As the holidays approach, here's what your friends without cancer need to hear -- and now you have some ideas of what to say

 (Credit: Photo taken by Ruban Rebalkin's camera, People left to right are here without permission)
Christmas time and New Years can be a social minefield of joy. It’s great that in the last two weeks of the year, all the triumph's of the past 12 months get together for one last hurrah. Now, add your diagnosis of cancer to the mix. How do you interact with everyone else — not just over the eggnog at that caroling party, but from here on in? What do you say that’s genuinely helpful when the whole situation is freaking them out?
I know that it’s hard for you too; I really do. In addition to dealing with my plasmacytoma diagnosis this spring, that so far has been unsuccessfully treated, I have in the past year watched as three of my blog readers get cancer and the guy who is peer pressuring me beyond the grave to get an iPad 2, Steve Jobs, of couse died. It can be a picnic loving someone when your life on the line. Because you’re not helpless. And if you’re wringing your hands wondering how to handle yourself, Cancer Man is here to offer a few simple guidelines.  When in doubt about how to behave, stick to the basic rule of thumb that it’s about you AND them. Let me expand.


  1. Great thoughts, Ruban. I hope the story about Spenser made you laugh a little ... We are thinking of you!

  2. You inspire me Rubes. Loved it!

  3. a good read... thanx for sharing.


  4. Hi Ruben, I'm Helen, a friend of Theresa's - I finally had a chance to sit and really read your story-wow-what an amazing person you are. I wish you all the best-typos and all lol!! Take care on your journey with your family and your health, wherever it takes you. People like you are an inspiration to us all and will find peace and happiness wherever your journey takes you. Take care and keep smiling.
    Thank you for your wonderful words. From Helen